Modesty seems to be a hot-button issue today. It seems to reek of “patriarchal control,” “old-fashioned moralism” and "rank legalism.” I am not here to flame one side or the other; rather, I want to open up the dialogue to examine, to really think through, why we do what we do.
The word “modesty” comes from the Latin for “moderation, sense of honour and correctness of conduct.” Historically, we tend to think about modesty merely in the sense of clothing; I would like to argue that we ought to be modest both in dress and in manner out of proper heart-posture towards God and others.
We know from God’s word and our experience that God created aesthetic, beauty and diversity. These things are good, and it is good that we enjoy them. How do we do this rightly and help others do the same?
As God’s ambassadors, we represent his kingdom to the world. When others see us, what—who—do they see? Are they so distracted by skin or by brand that they miss the reflected image of Jesus Christ? Are we compromising our witness by our inconsistency?
Moreover, we are called to not cause our brothers and sisters in Christ to stumble. This requires sacrificial love as we bear with each other and forgo that which we know not to be sinful.
Now this is not to say that I am advocating for a particular set of social norms to which everyone must conform nor am I trying to mandate morality. We have freedom to do as we please! But are we choosing to please God?
To get to the deeper matter: modesty isn’t about “Can girls wear crop tops?” or “Should men wear long hair?” The root of true modesty is humility. It is an attitude of contentment with what has been given and not posturing before men.
In total transparency, I struggle with this more than I’d like to admit. I happen to enjoy dressing well and am often driven by aesthetics. However, it is so easy to make an idol out of these things, loving them outside of their proper place.
Everyone is going to have a different conception of modesty. I do not discount the weight this word carries. What I’d like for us as a community of believers to consider is this: what do people see when they look at me? Do they see God?